The first of these I met in high school. She was easily one of the smartest women I've ever been around and at the time we began dating, I was at the bottom of the pile of misfit students. Up until I met her, I had no desire to achieve anything except in sports, and as it turned out, my prowess on the basketball court was what first caught her eye. Soon after we began dating, I realized just how lazy I was towards school and within months, I had gone from being a certain dropout to making the honor roll, albeit it, mainly in much lower level classes than those she excelled in. Even with my new found lease on academics, I graduated with a GPA of 1.6. As other friends went off to college, factory jobs, or jail, my love for her pushed me to join the Air Force to find an alternate way to earn a living. For the next 12 years, her positive influence not only got me started in college, but helped me get over the one thing holding me back - "me." Our life together fell apart, but my pursuit of a higher education was firmly rooted in those years when she had more faith in my ability than I did. Looking back, I really cannot imagine the dismal existence I would probably be living right now had she not taken a chance on someone that was far from her intellectual equal - then or now.
Soon after we parted ways, I became friends with a young college classmate who was dealing with many of the same insecurities that had or were still plaguing my maturity. We attended classes together throughout our bachelor's degree years and spent many nights pushing each other. She was my first truly wonderful friend outside of marriage and I fast became like family. In the areas I've always had a low aptitude in, i.e., time management, she excelled and helped me to maintain focus. Likewise, in areas where I was more accomplished such as paper writing, I paid her back in spades. In ways, we perfectly complimented one another and even today we remain close friends.
As a prelude to my mid-life crisis, I had my moment of "love at fourth sight." I tried for years to describe the feelings I felt during the short period of time I was around her before she moved away, and never succeeded. And yet, I fell in love with writing poetry simply as a means of expressing those feelings she left me with during that magical month. I've often wondered how different my life would have been had that moment never happened when I just knew in an instant, but then I toss it aside just like I did caution to the wind back then, because I know my life became richer because of those feelings I experienced. Butterflies, butterflies.
Another "beautiful mind" that compelled me to push myself even farther than I had previously imagined, did so after the fact. She was brilliant, seductive, and pretty much had a Midas effect an anything she touched. I'd never be around someone like her. She could do anything she set her mind to and even today, I'm still in awe of her many natural talents and abilities. While our parting was .... let me conservatively say "painful" it also helped spark something inside me to do more with my life. I know it put a chip on my shoulder that I wasn't able to shake until I heard my name called at graduation followed by "Master of Education with Honors." The mellowing effect of age and time passing has allowed me to reflect back now and appreciate the good and the bad as a catharsis for evolution from within....and in turn, I'm happy to see her growth as well. I truly ponder about my intuitive thoughts about a future meeting...
For a perfect travel partner, I stumbled across someone with very similar tastes and a built in need for travel. She was incredibly patient, supportive, pretty, and an incredible sense of direction. Stylistically, she was a fashion diva that had her own unique standard for what she wore and nobody could touch her style. Of course, I hold a soft-spot in my heart for such people....which must mean I'm sooooo vain. Her look begged me to photograph her and thus began my ever expensive hobby of photography. She also exposed me to big city life and for someone that grew up in an area where 2 miles away from home was another universe, I came to embrace the thrill of discovering what was around every new corner in a city that never sleeps. She had an aspect of bravery about her that I still admire her for today. I truly miss her sense of adventure..... and the sound her laughter.
During a good portion of my Master's degree program, I found the perfect study partner and an even better friend. I'm sure in her whole life she never envisioned becoming friends with "someone like me," but by the time she was done with school and looking to go back home, we both felt the same that we had experienced something wonderful together. Call it shared-suffering or whatever you like, but our hours spent struggling to achieve success in our studies invoked a unique and special bond between us. I could never have stayed the course as successfully without her. In the world of academics where help given to others is often a thankless endeavor....I'm truly thanking her not just for helping me, but for trusting in me when the chips were down. Time and again, I proved to myself that I work best under pressure and especially when I'm trying ot impress someone. Somehow, I never quit trying to impress her, because she was so intelligent that I didn't want to let her down.
From a spiritual perspective, a fairly recent friend has helped me reconnect with God in a much more meaningful way, as I admit I had seemingly wandered away without realizing it. We have spent hours studying the Bible together, but it has all been about the Bible. We share many similar "likes" and "dislikes" and both of us are extremely competitive, so that often leads to challenges in sports that we take seriously. In ways, we are kindred spirits and I think that has to do with growing up in similiar environments. She has sacrificed much for me and in ways I feel an indebtedness that cannot be repaid. She has leadership qualities and boundless energy that I wish I possessed. She's an overcomer...
Lastly, I have to thank my closest friend whose name should be translated to mean "perseverance." She defines herself as lazy and yet routinely works 50 hours a week, on her feet. She accuses herself of having no goals, but achieves things others give up on. She's always in a search for something that she probably always had, and though she often feels short of friends, the many that she has don't want to imagine a day without her. Like many of my friends, we share the "middle-child syndrome." We also share the ability of "agreeing to disagree" and walk away from any discussion and/or argument with respect and support for the other person. Few people know the inner workings of my brain as she does. Throughout so many of my trials and tribulations, she has been a constant companion, an ear for which to vent, a congratulatory voice in my successes, and a voice of reason when I've overthought or overreacted to something or someone. Above all, she has earned my complete trust and that is extremely rare for me to say. I would have to say the innocense of her heart astounds me.
So, as you can see, I owe much to several outstanding ladies. Some I dated, and some I did not...one, I married. I adore each of them and whether they remain in my life or not, they are always in my thoughts, prayers, and each holds a special place in my heart for the inspiration they gave to me. I believe that the people you can never forget are the ones who come into your life, and simply by being themselves, they make you a better person. You borrow from the traits they possess in which you lack, and whenever it serves to better you - you immulate the finer aspects of their human nature. I hope to credit these ladies for much of whatever is good about me. As for the bad, I alone am to blame.